Kicking Ass Today!!!

I joined a 30 day challenge and decided to start early. I am going to go to the gym 3 times a week and have an ab challenge too. I also will try to eat healthy through out the 30days, log all food and water.

So far  today has been good, I have done very well even though I want to eat the lasagna I made yesterday. Guess I will have some tomorrow and figure out the rest of the week.

I did go to the gym today and did weight and the ab challenge, I am tired but I am also out of shape too. So going back to the gym feels good. Also downloaded the app called fitmusic and I  love it!!! You can pick and its all mixed and ready for you.

I love mixes of music and it kept me going at the gym today :)

Okay, I need to do other things and relax.

Dreary Day

Today I worked but I also got most of the day off which is nice. It is very gloomy outside which sucks but there is rain in the forecast.

Anyways I was upset earlier about stupid stuff and now I am feeling better. I made lasagna today and added in spinach, some kale, asparagus into the beef. I have not tired it yet but will. I also ate ice cream and pizzza because I was stressed out.

Oh well, starting a 30 day challenge in July and will see what happens with it. I am aslo goign to watch movies on hulu or just one movie then read before bed.

Not much else is going on in my life at least not today.

Family Outing

I am home from a family outing and it went better than I expected it to go. I usually feel so out of place and just don't fit in at all when I am around family.

There was food and I am trying to lower my cholesterol and the food we had at the cookout was not healthy, so today will be cheat day and tomorrow will be healthy day.

I do feel bad for my cousin because she only had family there today and she even put it on facebook and invited friends too but no one showed. I wasn't doing anything else today and drove over.

My baby cousin was cute and met my cousins boyfriend and I ate a lot of food.

So I guess I shouldn't think this way again but it's so hard because I really feel like I am a failure with my family and that I will never be good enough. It sucks being this way, going to try and be more positive.

Family and Open House

I'm going to see family today but part of me wants to stay home. My cousin bought a house and is having an open house today which is fine. I feel like I'm not good enough to even go.

My cousin is Miss perfect, with the perfect life and car and house and child and she is just perfect in every way.

I'm the loser of the family and no matter how hard I try, I will never be good enough for them. It sucks because I love my family but I really don't think my family loves me. None of us are close at all and I can tell you know is close to me. It just sucks.

I work hard and feel like it is for nothing! I try to better myself but my cousin is the perfect one and I'm the loser. I may just stay home and if I go either I am walking or I will drive myself so I can leave when I want to.

I have internet!!!

Hi everyone! I am unsure of when I last posted in here, feels a lot longer than what it probably is.

Good news.....I have internet!!! Finally got it installed at home so I don't have to use the app or go to the public library. I can now save on my data plan and I can stream!!! Super excited!

Not much is new, I need to read a lot more and start other books too. I have been working and I will be doing my LNA Mods for home health care. We did get rain today and now it is so hot outside! Crazy weather.

Okay, I may post again today but will see, need to do LNA homework.

Crappy day

I have been slacking!!! 

Also having a crappy day but oh well. Things have been ok, nothing major going on and just working.

Going to get internet soon which is a plus. Been working and reading too. I did get to beta for an author which I loved what she sent me.

Wish I could say more about it but can't until the books come out.

I'm ok, just not happy mentally. I guess I like attention and I really don't get any of that. It's like I'm a total loser no matter what I do in life.

It sucks and I can't afford therapy but did find an app that lets you talk to some for much cheaper then what you would pay a therapist which is good.

Haven't tried it yet but hopefully will.

More later, tired, bed, work all day tomorrow.

At The Library

I'm at the Keene Public Library and I was here to do LNA homework for my home health care job. Its a requirment and I get paid for it. I did 3 LNA Mods which is good but I get tired from doing them online.

I also looked up the reange for cholesterol and according to what I found, my cholesterol is high but the nurse I spoke with said it was a little high. I'm so confused about it and they will test my cholesterol again in 1-2 years. I don"t like that.

Anyways will be booking my ticket tonight to Minnesota for October, found a good deal going out of Manchester, NH and it will  be easier for my family if they pick me up and drop me off. Boston is cheaper but it's crazy down there so I chose to pay extra and fly out of Manchester.

Not much is new but I have read 4 books so far this month. I still need to put up a review for the book I recently finished. I am also currently reading another book and will start another soon. I have so many to read!

I'm sorry if I misspell anything. I am tired from LNA homework and my fingers don't do well when I am trying to type.

Okay, I need to go since I drove to the library because it looked like rain today and my time is almost up on the meter. I will try to post more later tonight. I will post my review on the book I finished.

Homework

I did some homework for my LNA license (Licend Nurse Assistant). I have to have 12 Continuing Education Units every year to renew my LNA. I did two mods today and I am caught up on hours for the nursing home which is good. I still need to get caught up with home health care.

I have been at the library and I'm ready to stretch and check a book out. Haven't done that in awhile but I'm going to try a different book.

Have the rest of today off unless the kitchen calls me in but I haven't heard from them yet. If not I will take a walk later.

Not much is new. Been reading and finished 2 books this month, starting another one and need to get reviews up on blog (Cassandra's Reviews). I have my reviews up on Amazon and goodreads thanks to the kindle app which updates both. That is a nice perk.

Okay, I will post more at some point. I need to stretch my limbs and I am now working in the kitchen tonight. Not bad, I do need the hours and it's a free meal too.

okay more later.